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| 2005 - Mexico Mission Trip |
And it wasn't just one time in my life I was that heavy, but at least twice. The photo is from 2005 when I was at or around that same weight.
It takes a lot for me to publicly admit that I let myself get that big. Many people will only tell you those numbers after they've lost all their weight, but I want to share it as a challenge to myself to continue this journey, and to others who think they can't even start.
I've lost around 55-60lbs., so you can do the math and figure out what I currently weight. But that number isn't a totally accurate picture as I've put on a lot of muscle the past year or two just from working out and being so heavy. You figure I was doing pushups with the equivalent of almost two fully loaded rucks on me!
The past two weeks at the F3 workout known as Skunkworks, I noticed a big change in my endurance. Of course with any new thing, it takes a while to build up your endurance, but it's taken almost six months to get to where I could actually complete a Skunkworks workout without stopping, skipping a set, whatever. But the past two weeks, I completed the whole set, and didn't skip anything! Shocked is the word I would use. It's a very nice surprise to say the least.
It would be so easy to brag on myself that I'm over half way to my goal weight, but it would be ridiculous, yes, ridiculous to do so. F3 has made such an impact on me and is one reason that this journey has continued.
I had no idea how much I was missing out on by missing out on F3. I had no real male leadership in my life. I had no one challenging me to push myself and to break down barriers. Mental as well as physical barriers were deeply entrenched and constantly told me I wasn't worthy, I wasn't worth anything and to not expect much out of life. I still battle those voices, many times on a daily basis, but they don't win in the end. F3 has become so entrenched in my life now, that it's not going away. It simply is part of my life and part of who I am and who I'm becoming.
Friday is a good example. I got up about 4:15 to get ready to workout at F3 and so I left with plenty of time to make it there by 5:30. I'm less than a mile from the school when traffic comes to a complete stop. There is a train blocking my way. After several minutes, I decide I will have to turn around and find another way to the school.
On my way I call a F3 brother to let him know of the issue. He calls back shortly and tells me that the train has been stopped there for at least 30 minutes. Great.
At this point a temptation came - give it up and just go to breakfast!
I kept going and arrived at the school about 15 minutes late. Then came the another temptation - No one was within sight, I was tempted to leave.
Of course unbeknownst to me, the two F3 brothers that made it to the school despite the train, had spotted me and were on the way back to the parking lot to pick me up.
We take off to the track and we do a quick warm up then head over to a hill for some hill work along with burpees - yes burpees, my mortal enemy.
Then came another temptation - Burpees are hard! Don't do them and say you are modifying! Thankfully I ignored that temptation as well and started doing burpees. To my surprise, I was able to do all 45 burpees in the set! Another big milestone for me.
I didn't even mention that my car had made a strange noise on the way to F3, and I was tempted to call it off before I even got stopped by the train!
So I share all this to encourage you and let you know that sometimes you won't have it easy trying to change your life.
Sometimes the weather is perfect, the temperature is perfect, you did your laundry and have clean workout clothes, you got a good night's rest, on and on.
But many times things will not workout for your workout. Workout anyway.
If you're late to workout, go anyway. If the car makes weird noises, workout anyway. If the weather sucks, workout anyway. Just keep going, if anything you will find out that you can do things you never thought possible, if you'll just stay consistent. If you wait until life is perfect, then I can guarantee you'll never change your life. It was true for me.
I worked out at a boot camp before and while I was pretty consistent, I also too easily would give up on being there. It's raining hard? Can't go. I'm sore from Tuesday? Can't go. On and on, you get the point.
This winter though out in the cold has somehow built a resolve in me to not give up and to show up workout after workout, no matter what the conditions. And the one or two times I did want to bail, my F3 brothers didn't let it slide and they got me to post anyway. Even in 8 degrees!
I have no idea if this means anything to anyone besides me, but if you've read this far, don't give up. Whatever you have going on in life, don't give up. There is someone, maybe many someone's that love you and would be devastated if you suddenly were gone.
This past weekend a dear friend suddenly passed away, apparently from a heart attack. It would be easy to point a finger and say he wasn't taking care of himself, but I don't know that to be true or not. For all I know, he may have been doing the best he could.
But either way, we should all do our best to take care of our bodies. It's the only one we're going to get in this life, and if you don't take care of yours then you don't get another.
I hope this will encourage someone along the way to take care of their health and life and to push your boundaries. Find a group of people, F3, FIA or whoever that will push you, encourage you and not leave you behind when things get hard.
Until next time...
